Its valentines day today..
Happy Valentines day everyone!

I saw alot of things today..
alot alot.
Haiz..
In the morning, on my way to school for ttb test,( what the hell lor! Valentines leh. give wad shitty test? bet all the lecturers and teachers there NO LIFE.)
in sch, i saw serena.
So while walking to biz sch, i saw him.
I am sort of in a bad condition today la..
lyk having breakouts and all..
i didnt want to see anyone at all.
so i didnt really say hi..
i juz looked and continue walking.
Mayb i juz though of him for 10 minutes?
that was whether to tell serena that i saw him since i have talked about him to her b4.
But i didnt realy think much of it though.

My ttb test was macham shit.
Coz they asked shitty questions and i gave shitty answers, which i expect shitty results.
I went home etc etc...
ok fast forward to work.
Didnt want to work today..
but to grant a pair of lovebirds their 1st valentines together,
i worked lor.
Take over her ma..

Not all the ppl who ate there were couple..
probably 60-70%?
Families still go out during valentines.
probably mum wanna celebrate and rekindle their long lost love with dad but duwanna leave kids at home. so brought a few lightbulbs along. yada yada yada..

there were also ppl in grps...
lyk groups of girls and guys..
guess they dun have a partner.. so they go out with each other to occupy their minds, so that they dun turn so desperate at night when they see so many couples hugging and kissing at almost every corner.

After work, Emo Egg said she was sad( She called me to call her Emo Egg, and she juz broke up etc.. )
So since we ended early, i agreed to go CHEERS with her to buy smth,
nua around the area to DRINK.
on our way to CHEERS, i saw him.
totally cannot believe my eyes.
I haven seem him for damn long..
more thn half a year?
i also haven seen him for damn long. but i dun giv a damn.. HAHA.
anyway, at that moment, all the lost feelings came back..
i felt super confused..
i didnt noe what to do..
should i say hi?
or should i juz pretend i didnt see him?
Apparently i chose the latter.
I was filled with regrets after that.
i felt that i should have said hi.
What might happen to us after we said hi?
Who was he waiting for?
What is he doing there?
I thought of the different kinds of possibilities in my mind.
After all, i liked him for so long.
Though i have more or less forgot about it,
but after seeing him,
even when we didnt even talk,
even when he didnt even see me( which i rather certain that he didnt)
i was still lyk humpty dumpty( duno how to spell),
about to fall and break any moment.
The feeling was damn awful. it was lyk all ur emotions stuck at ur throat. waiting to burst.
Yet, it is not full enuf to burst and make u cry.
The so many "ifs" made me feel worse.

I was very tempted to walk back and say hi..
but i didnt..
probably part of me didnt want to see him given my current imperfect looks.
part of me didnt know how to face him
yet part of me wants to talk to him so much.

I hated myself for having such imperfect skin at such a critical time.
Probably, if my skin was better, i would have approached him.
But then again, if there were so many ifs and they come true,
i would have already been one of the top scholars in Singapore.

What am i thinking?
Why am i still thinking of him..
Frankly speaking,
when i was working, i was hoping to see him..
see him with his bunch of friends..
unknowingly walked into my workplace to eat.
and see me. talk to me. and things going back to what it was in the past.

I feel lyk a freaking stupid person.
Why am i thinking of him on Valentines day?
Why did i see him on Valentines Day?
Was it fate?( i usually just go home. Nv pass by Cheers ever since i worked there)
Did he think of me during Valentines Day?
Did he miss me?
Have he ever had the urge to call me?

For the last 3 questions, i probably already have the answer in my heart.
But im just not willing to accept the truth.



**************************
To bring everyone to a lighter part.
while going home,
i eavesdropped on a conversation.

the guy asked" huh? was it french or normal?"
I was thinking what was he talking about.
But the only french(s) i knew are only manicures and kisses
Since he is a guy, ( unless he is gay) i kind of conclude that they were talking about kisses.

Apparently, the other person on the line was too stupid to know what a french kiss is..
and acting smart,
he trys to " show off " on his "skills" to his friend
he says" french kissing can melt a girls heart"
he was obviously so engrossed in boasting about his"knowledge" that he didnt realise that i was laughing at him behind
thn he says" oh, there must be skills in french kissing. have to learn one. Not many people can be good at french kissing. But now you are talking to one."

ROFL!!!!!
i almost wanted to explode from laughing already la!!!!
HAHAHAAHAHAH